Friday, February 8, 2013

The second day of school is always a bit crazy. I think all the mom's agree. After snacks there's no controlling the masses! I think, actually I hope to high heaven, my kids aren't as naughty as they are at my house. Emmett just flat out refuses to participate and Ty always wants to be right in my face so no one else can see. If I say 'You guys are crazy!', that just encourages a spree of cartwheels and somersaults. When I was a kid I always wanted to grow up to be a teacher. I played for hours with my stuffed animals. So I'm happy to fulfill a life long dream, but I sometimes wish they were a little more like my stuffed animals - quiet and still:)
The McMillan girls have wanted to get together for quite awhile to start up a monthly craft day. We finally all found time and wanted to get some Valentines Day decorations done. Pinterest is chuck full of ideas. The two I wanted to do were: a corkscomb heart wreath with a big satin bow and a black and white striped canvas with a pink button filled red felt heart. Darling!! Because I am disorganized, try as I might not to be and always in a rush, I found none of my ingredients and so did a spin-off of the canvas...dark red and white stripes, brown, pink and green button filled white felt heart. Yikes! Not so good. Maybe it's a good thing I don't have anywhere to display my projects! I want a design, crafty bone and I try, but I'm just not naturally good so I always hurry and usually fail. I don't know why I was skipped. Seriously, my mom..genius designer, Tiffany, amazing - in fact Hobby Lobby and Target want her to design a party line! Shannon, super creative. Cristelle, perfect. Ashley, great eye for photography. Anywho it was so fun never the less and I love all my s'sil! Josh called while I was there and asked if I wanted to go on a date. We've kind of been in a rough spot, (don't worry nothing serious) so he was all shy about it...Love him. We went and saw 'The Impossible' and wow what an amazing story! "Luckily" Paden was fussy so Josh and him had to go sit in the corner:) and I could cry my bloody eyes out! I think if something like that ever happened to me, if I was holding my child, there's no way any force of nature could break us apart. I know it's unrealistic but that's really how I feel.  I was so grateful for the ending, when the brothers found each other how intensely happy they were and how I know that's what it will be like when we die. Such happy reunions. How blessed I am to know that! I wanted to rush home to the boys and hold them so tight. Who cares if Ty never listens and Emmett is so strong willed and Paden has blow-outs!
Everyday I think how I need to improve my parenting skills! I really think I'm bipolar and probably suffer from a little SADD. Somedays are great, some horrid. But the book Heaven is Here, seriously gave me a wake up call. I need to slow down, talk to my children and worry and cry and be super crazy and happy with them. I need to remember the little things they do that make me smile daily. Me and my good friend Bonnie were talking the other night while Roman, Ty, Emmett and Jack went nuts in the mortuary. She is so calm and collected and smart and funny. I think she's close to perfect. But we have so many of the same concerns and challenges and worries and sometimes I feel like I'm the only one that has the temper of a 3 year old, but alas it isn't so and I have hope. Your first child HAS to be a rock, for all the learning you do as a parent.
My mom's birthday is today and she is just great I tell you. I wonder, though she's told me, if she had to learn. She's always been amazing to me. I don't think I ever talked about her like other kids talked about there parents. I just have so much love and respect for her and want all of her knowledge RIGHT NOW! We got together for some breakfast and a little shopping. Missed you Ash(and dad!). I'm scared to have girls, but when I get together with my sisters and mom, I want that someday. Hoping the next 3 are! I love that there's no holding back or bitterness. They are my foundation and I am grateful everyday for them. Today we all realized we are going brain dead. I hope we're the 6 crazy ladies laughing until tears come like g'ma and her sisters were...

1 comment:

gillar girl said...

. . . and Elle transforms boring brown land into gorgeous landscapes and gardens. You are such a talented designer!! I love you my sister!